seriouslyscorpio

thoughts of the moment and of my life

Category Archives: sadness


by

EBOLA…….ARE WE STILL IN THE DARK AGES?


There was an age, it seemed, when discovery was slowing…Reptiles had lost control of the earth, weather had calmed, and man had begun to focus on being, instead of surviving. Sure, there were still wars and strife, those being in control wanting to keep it, and those ‘outed’, wanting it back.

Most of the ordinary had come to terms with enjoying childhood and adulthood. It was a good time because people were finally getting a grasp, however, small on what our existence could really be like. We could have it good…..and for those who had never reached that height, it was marvelous. Good was wonderful. Dark times were a thing of the past.

Parents watched over their siblings….Adults watched over their neighborhoods….governments watched over their countries. Discovery was taking an upward and exciting turn, as science looked to conquering the deadliest and even the most ugly of chronic diseases. Sure, it cost money….discovery and safety always do. Companies grew, ideas were born, and it was still good, or better than ever before.

Travel left two feet and rose to thirty-thousand. Fast super-trains whooshed across country and countryside as the world grew smaller and more responsive to faraway lands only seen in books a few decades ago. Commerce grew among countries almost as fast as between local cities.
Oil was sought after, diamonds were a premium, and the stock markets rose and fell in milliseconds.

Still, no one realized the importance of the worrisome word they left behind in their daily chatter…..surviving. Business continued its reign in the world market as did the pleasure of cruising ships and luxurious air travel. What once was a ‘memorable moment’ became an everyday and very boring occurrence as we entertained ourselves across the seas, never wondering or even realizing who had sat or slept in our spot only a few hours ago.

Sure there were ‘clues’, but c’mon, we had made it, the dark ravages of centuries before us were far in the past. Products made us comfortable. Aids was now chronic and not deadly. And drugs, there was something for everyone and everything…almost.

And then, oh so quietly, ebola woke up, in the middle of lonely outposts of wavering civilizations….Only the bravest, the most devoted visited there, in those tiny villages of raw sewage and painful living. And so it grew, one by one, until some one noticed. It was so far away we thought, them—us. Someone will get a handle on this and we’ll all be fine. But it seems no one has….what is 250 or 2500 with a 50% death rate. The other diseases always faded away.

But now it is here….among us, the ordinary, not the survivors. And we are worried. Who did I shake hands with, who sneezed on me, who sat in my seat with a sweaty and perhaps feverish body… Who?

And here is the hard part….still no one worries……Companies need a better bottom line; parents need to visit kids in Europe or Africa or the US, product needs to be shipped so bills can be paid. Commerce has to go on, period.

How dark will this age be…..will drugs control disease, will planes stop traffic from affected areas so containment can be established; will people concede travel plans should be denied. Will pleasure cruises refuse passengers who have been in or near affected areas for at least 6 months? Will countries close their borders to stop death? And if so……when

Sur3e there


by

NFL……can’t govern jack….and for sure, doesn’t worry about jill!


just can’t pass this one up……how sad it is that an organization of the NFL’s so-called caliber cannot count on it’s own morals and ethics enough to respect women…and to prove (not improve) its position.. has to employ/acknowledge the very center of conflict….in order to “relieve” its own stupidity to the public…….CHOSEN LADIES…..go to women’s shelters every day before negotiating….Remember the eyes of the children who live in fear….and the ‘lost’ future of the women who seek asylum there…


by

LIV’IN IN THE HOOD….OUR CUL-DE-SAC


Most of us just bump along in this life. I’m not saying life is boring…it’s just that we get caught up in the ordinary….I’m as guilty as the next person in that regard. I am doing my best to snap out of it cause there should be no such word as ordinary in this or any other language. Maybe the best word for me is ‘comfortable’, as in happy to be where we are.

Our neighborhood is a wonderful example of ‘comfortable’. I guess it is an old neighborhood, like 25+ years. I remember the day my hubby and I found we could buy this home. It had been $30,000 more than we could afford and we would look at it longingly when we came to visit our friends one street over. One Sunday afternoon our friends called….it seemed the developer wanted to add another section and couldn’t make it happen with the bank, unless he sold the ones he had…..our neighborhood, our house, was now affordable, dropping $30,000 that sunny afternoon and we drove out to buy it.

We watched it being built, still in disbelief, and on a special week in August, we joined total strangers to create a close knit community, called our cul-de-sac.

Families with kiddies of all ages began to unpack and make a house their home. Some came from 100 miles, some just newly retired from 1000 miles, and everything in between. Ages were just as varied.

You know when neighborhoods are first created, it is all by chance. Ours was surely that way and it was magical. The blend was perfect. We all began to ‘spruce up’…..front yards were planted but not the back. No back steps, no patios, no trees, no bushes, just lots of dirt and trust me, loads of weeds. Whoever found a knowledgeable ‘micro climate’ advisor, a mulch company, and especially a concrete guy, became the ‘go to’ person of the hour. We learned quickly this area did not lend itself to the plants we brought from the cooler areas on the California coast. But what we did learn was that our beloved ‘coast’ plants brought snails…and snails and more snails. Dang….and we did it our selves. I must say, however, after 25 years, the snails have gone elsewhere….the climate just being too dry for them to enjoy themselves. (thank goodness)

So these years have flown by….little kids became high school grads, then out of college and on their own. Parents became grandparents and aunts and uncles, but still the cul-de-sac remained ‘comfortable’….Cookouts were common when second or third families moved in. July 4th brought families of families and Halloween brought hot cider for adults and pets dressed up as Godzilla…. And it continued to be ‘comfortable’.

Now, all of a sudden, it is more than 25 years later, and 1/2 of us are still original owners. The ‘newbies’ have either conformed to our ways, or we have to theirs. It is still warm to come home….to see friends/to wave goodbye as they go off on vacation, or when they come back from church. We smile as we remember teens being teens, running out of refrigerator room during the holidays, or even using another’s oven when it became crunch time.

We have had our sad times when those in our circle have moved on, and today my heart is teary as a great family has decided the same. It is and will be good for them. Change is good, even when it makes us stretch our ‘comfortable’ life. It will be a new chapter for the cul-de-sac family as well. They will take their laughter, their Christ led family, their extended family, and our love with them, and all will be well…..in their new neighborhood, where life will, once again, be ‘comfortable’. Miss’in you already…..


by

TONIGHT, I’M ‘IN THE GARDEN’


Fly’in by the seat of my pants on this one…..My friend is close to dying, in a hospital far away.

Sometimes he wants to go and sometimes he says out loud “I want to live, I don’t want to die!” and then he struggles to breathe. I’ve been thinking of him, about what I’d do, if it were me, etc….all day.

He has been sick for about 4 years. He is a Christian. He teaches it, he believes it, and is joyous to be a disciple. His cancer has come and gone, again and again. He musters himself to the cancer center for chemo, tests, talks, suggestions, and promise. Then he returns home to face his demons with strength from his God, his family, his church, his friends.

His walk with God is friendly, as a long married couple, who seems to know what the other is thinking. And yet, like all of us, he loves his life. He enjoys what God has provided all …finches announcing the rising sun on a summer’s day; the smell of orange blossoms, the hugs he receives at church, the ability to help in healing services and offer communion; the joy of a son, the burst of beauty as fall comes to New England, the Gulf of Mexico cooling his feet during an evening walk, and just knowing, in spite of it all, God is with him,in him, around him, thru him, as He is with everyone.

As a friend, I want him in peace and without pain. As a friend, I don’t want to lose him. As a Christian, I know it is all ok.

This is not my first friend to come close to death, or to die. My first was a good friend in my church who died when we were in our early 40’s. I hurt for her then because her death was an a health accident. She was so brave. I had another friend who died of ovarian cancer. She had it for years and no doctor ever caught it. We were in our 50’s then.

Now I am 70 and it is hard to even type the number. Losing those friends of 10, 20, 50 years will become more common…and I will, once again, see and feel great bravery, just as I see right now.

So on this June day, I to feel lost in time…not knowing whether is peace will come with death, or with a rejuvenation to live on, ready to continue the fight….so the songs of finches can awaken him tomorrow morning.

Peace be with you all, in whatever chapter your life is in.
And if you have an old hymnal around, read the words of ‘In the Garden”….it serves me well in times like these.


by

THERE’S A PARTY GO’IN!


Wow….or maybe it should be WOW!! It is party time in SW Florida and the city is not one you regularly party in on Fri. night…well, at least not all the time. IT’S THE GULF OF MEXICO, of course. It is springtime in the Gulf and on the Gulf and the place is jump’in.

Everyone who is anyone in the Gulf Kingdom is coming home to reunite with some and partner up with others. It seems they’ve spent the winter in the deeper waters of the Gulf for safety and warmth, but now the beach waters are 80F and the welcome mat is out.

Mother Nature/God sure set it up right. The breezes are mild, the bugs are few and the snow
birds have gone north. The beaches are relatively quiet as big and little couples come to be a part of the large guest list. As in the order of things, there are some who depend on the lunching of others to keep this arrangement in harmony. I plan to ask Mother Nature/God about this when I visit the other side. If I ever come back, I’ll write about what they say.

Be that as it may, these wonderful creatures come home with great folly. There are schools of little fish…just new babies who stay close to each other or Mom/Dad. Some come from long egg pods that look like snake skeltons…and are they a work of art. Others look like the rubber seals that keep canned peaches tasty.

In the sky, parent and child Osprey glide and squawk during daily lessons. As in our species, many children carry on something terrible when mom quits bringing the daily meal. Goes to prove that leaving the nest is not exciting for everyone.

The skates come to visit for the summer in April/May of each year. They definitely add a ‘shuffle’ to our step when we take our daily walks. You see, they love to nestle in the very shallow waters of the Gulf….looking for tasty morsels. After finding a spot, they wiggle/shiver into the sand and do whatever….maybe take a nap.
However!!

When someone or something comes by unannounced, these tiny darlings become a little startled and whip their tail around to barb whoever is nearby. Well, dang, I can vouch for the fact that THAT HURTS!! Keep in mind, however, I’ve been coming here for 35 years and have only been stung once…and it was my fault….not shuffling in a skate zone. No ticket given, but 45 min of pouring super hot water on the spot to ease the toxins, taught me well.

More later…….your correspondant, from the beach says tootle


by

I AM YOUR POLICY……FROM THE OLD DAYS


While gleaning old files, and shredding in front of the TV, I ran across this letter, attached to a policy that has been cashed in…….thought you would enjoy a little of the ‘old days’ of explanation.

 

                                                        I AM YOUR POLICY

You and I have purpose in this world, which,when broken down, are quite similar. It is YOUR job to provide food, clothing, shelter, schooling, medicine and sundry other things for your loved ones;  you do this while I lie in your strong box.

I must have faith and trust in YOU, Mr. Policyholder, for out of your earnings will come the cost of MY upkeep.  At times I may appear to be somewhat worthless to you–, but someday (and who knows when) you and I will change places.

When you are laid to rest, I will come alive and do YOUR job.  I will provide the food, clothing, shelter, schooling, medicine and other things your family will continue to need — just as you are now doing.  When YOUR work and toil is done, MINE will begin, through ME, your hands will carry on.

Whenever you feel the price you are paying for my upkeep is burdensome, remember, that I WILL DO MORE FOR YOU AND YOUR FAMILY THAN YOU CAN EVER DO FOR ME.

Mr. Policyholder, if you do your part, I will do mine.

 

Sincerely

Your policy

                                           ‘CAN WE HEAR AN ….’AWWWWW’


by

SUNSHINE MEDICINE


“You may have a medical problem”……runs shivers up and down your spine.  Even in the movies, those words make us tremble.  We are all act brave, showing that ‘devil may care’ attitude, but deep inside our gut is churning and the sunny day goes to turbulent winds with the threat of rain.

It is checkup time…..an ultrasound for me and a colonoscopy for him.  Been there more than once and yet it still creeps into our daily living, like the fog from the Pacific.  Warm winds of serenity touching the cool winds of change…..cause us to become solitary, even though there is no prediction of doom.

So the bootstraps are pulled up…..as we become nonchalant in the face of  our inner fearfulness. 

We then begin to rationalize, and examine…..what are the odds…I take good care of myself….it doesn’t run in my family, and on and on.  We do begin to feel better, and our sleep goes undisturbed.

The day comes for our tests…..and the phone rings for each of us…..”sure, we’ve done everything, we’ll be there, no problem”.  The medical facility is warm, and friendly, and we are ushered to our rooms.  We look into the eyes of the staff, watching as they take pictures, in hopes of finding reassuring glances that all is well.  The procedures are over almost as quickly as they begin and we welcome the lifting of the haze of  marking time.

The phones ring the next afternoon….and with certitude, we answer.  “Just calling to say your test was negative and all is well”…..”We’ll see you next year”.    The phone rings again.  “The results of your procedure are negative”. We’ll see you in 5 years”.     And the sun shines once more.


by >


I read two papers this AM with 3 cups of coffee…..let me say it again, I READ TWO NEWSPAPERS  this morning with 3 cups of coffee.  My kids tell me I’m really ‘out of mainline journalism’…..I’m in ‘mail-line journalism…and that is further out.   I’m sad if it is the truth….that the days of newspapers are fading.  Yes, the word ‘sad’ is appropriate.

The better part of my 68 years I’ve shared with a newspaper…..When I was learning to read….the newspaper was always in my home.  Mother and Dad read, and then I read.  Sure, at the age of 10 I wasn’t all that interested in the front page, but there were always the ‘funnies’.  Kind of like learning to iron…..first you start with the hankies and then you move onward to more difficult pieces of clothing. That’s how the newspaper and I made friends.

Then, in high school, sometimes things in my small brain began to gel….I would read something in the paper and low and behold…we’d talk about it in government or history.  Dang!

And now, after all these years, I’m more of an avid reader than ever.  I learn every day…whether it is a joke, a piece of history, a sale, a divorce, a birth, a death, and on and on. LIFE is the newspaper and the newspaper is life.  It tells me the weather, the high school basketball scores, the time of the July 4th parade, the mass at church, the sale at the local dress shop, the fishing report for the local lake, and the local police beat…often and thank goodness, more humorous than scary.

I would be foolish to say the Internet has not proved to be another great spot for the news….I know we can hear it all on local TV stations as well as  CNN and FOX, but that’s not the news I long for….We all live in little areas..they may be inside large  cities or on farms, distant from neighbors, however, we all desire to be close to one another….The local newspaper, whether it is weekly, bi weekly, in the morning or in the evening, binds our hearts, our lives, our dreams, and it extends the hand of friendship to all.

When traveling thru Tennessee, I read about the lives of folks in Nashville, Knoxville, and all the little towns in between.  I look at their housing, their taxes, as well as their squabbles with local, county and state government.  It truly does my heart good to see that we are pretty much the same, regardless of our proximity to one another.  Soccer might be hot in So. California, but football is the game in Louisiana. High school football barely makes it in some western states, however, in Indiana, and the Ohio Valley, the homes are empty on Fri. night cause they are at the game.   In the assisted care facilities…..everyone is in their room…..not cause they feel bad….but in season….it is basketball and football that keeps the lights on late into the night.

And last but not least…I love the ads…Where am I going to find so easily…..the for rent and for sale section, the used car section, the misc. for sale section, the legal announcement section, the inside ads for carpet, granite, hot dogs. 2 for 1, picking fresh blueberries, and the editorial section, including all the letters to the editor.  So much entertainment, so much knowledge, so much life…..and all  available in the paper.

So go ahead, read the Internet, learn that Tiger won his 74th, that the Supreme Court did or did not make the right decision, and the high in Las Vegas will be 104…..but for me, I’ll use it as backup only…..cause it is the paper…..I truly love.


by

GIVE IT UP FOR………


Here we are, bumping along.  There are ‘up’ days, ‘medium’ days, (normal) and ‘down days’. (Really all three are normal, right)  So here we are, bumping along, and then……there we go.  Exit bumping. Exit normal days.  Exit life..we’re dead!

Now what shall become of us…..woulda, coulda, shoulda thoughts ‘should’a’ occurred prior to the ‘exit’ sign above us, but sometimes our ducks are not just ‘all in a row’, if you know what I mean. 

Wait, what about that little card?  I had that somewhere…dang where is it, my wallet, my purse, my top left drawer in the bedroom, with my passport, dang!

Well, not to worry now……as in ‘Elvis has exited……”. But, for the sake of this article, you do (or did) have that nice card.   This card is way past nice, it is the best of the best, the cat’s meow, the Taj Mahal, lotto, and more.   “Why”, you ask?  Simple……If  you only have one kidney that works, if you are blind, if your liver is shot, if your heart only pumps because of a machine, or heavy medication, this little card will be all the above and more.

You, the one newly exited,  offer the gift of life, with this little card. People and organizations world-wide have come together to offer those in need, a new chance at life, and you, my friend, are the integral part.  It is you who have, at one time, usually when you renewed your driver’s license, made the choice to donate your useful organs. Of course, at that time, death was at least 10 light years away, so it was not thought about prayerfully, but now!!!!!…….as you move on to the beautiful place you chose….that decision made in life is making life for others possible. 

The stuff worked for you while you had it and needed it, but now, it is surplus. For that child needing a new kidney, it is beyond words. For the soldier, blind from serving his country, it is the open door to life and work and family. For these thankful recipients, it is not surplus, it is opportunity………

……to begin to just ‘bump along’.

 


by

ever been abused?


mmmm….sorry if you have, Abuse comes in all shapes and sizes, and forms. My sister spent years with abuse. She is one of the bravest human beings I have ever known. She is still in a battle today, desperatly getting the divorce finalized so she can be rid of the intolerant and abusive man who hurt is all. More info later on how you can live with it, how you can stop it, how you can keep from dying, and you can live again.